If you aren’t a hunter, let me tell ya somethin’.  Deer archery season is quickly approaching.  It’s that time of year when I like to hang around in a tree and act like a nut!  I plant food plots, I practice shooting my bow, I fix old deer stands, and I swat lots of mosquitoes!  (mosquito is spanish for little fly…  I wonder how you say “Pain in the butt” in Spanish!)

I tell Honey Bunches I am off to fix deer stands.  “Don’t forget your swatter”, She says.  I am glad she reminded me.  Before I head off to the deep woods, I grab my combination “cow/mosquito whackin stick”.

The extra rains have made it easy for the little buggers to reproduce this year.  As I enter the woods, I begin yelling and thrashing the brush.  It is well known that surprising Salt Creek mosquitoes may result in an attack.  I yell and thrash until I get to the first deer stand.  Looks a little loose, I think to myself, I better tighten those straps.

While looking up and approaching the stand I lose my concentration for just a second.  That was all it took.  I trip over a baby mosquito.  The juvenile buzzes in a high pitch to alert the adults.  Now I hear the big ones coming.  The leaves tremble as they hover above the canopy.  I have come between them and their young, I run for it!

At the edge of the timber, I dive into my truck.  “Just in time”, I say to myself as the mosquitoes crash into the windows.  I drive like a mad man for home.  The windshield wipers smear the attackers as I flee.  It was pretty unsettling, but unlike many Salt Creekians, I made it out alive!

I careen into the driveway, leap from the truck, and slam the house door behind me.  Honey Bunches asks, “Where’s your stick?” Catching my breath, I tell her I dropped it.  “If you wanna go look for it, it should be by the first deer stand in the timber ‘, Thanks Honey Bunches!