I’m From The Country…

And I like it that way.  If I had a nickel for every time I have heard that, I... well... I'd have a lot of nickels!  Often, in my opinion, it is stretching the truth a little.  Who am I to judge?  Calling one's self  country is a state of mind I guess.  Growing up 7 miles from a town of 140 people doesn't give me the right to claim a patent on being from the country.  (remember that last sentence, i will reference it later)

"I'm From The Country"

I have held many jobs that wouldn't be associated with being from the country, and lived in cities larger than I will expand on here.  When mingling with the truly citified, you get the feeling that they look down on you a little.  That never bothered me.  Being around city folks who claim they are "more" country than others, bothers me a lot!  So, what started this little tirade today?  It was something I heard on the radio.

While listening to a scanner app on my Android phone (some of us hicks have these), I heard a conversation between 2 turkey hunters on their CB radios (I'm a high tech redneck).  It went something like this:

"We'll get 'em next time", "Yeah, not a good week", "It was worth it to get out of the city though", "Lucky I'm from the country, I hunt 5 blocks from my subdivision"What?!? I don't need to tell you rural residents what was wrong with that last transmission.  So I came up with a little Foxworthian test to tell if you are a "I'm from the country" poser.  You may not be quite as country as you think you are if you...

  • Call your buddies to make sure you wear the same color cowboy hats to the bar.
  • Use "I used to be a moto-cross rider, but now I'm a cowboy" to pick up chicks.
  • Spend extra money to camo anything, then buy the latest chrome wheels for it.
  • Don't realize "hunting camp" is a working farm the rest of the year.
  • Say "blocks", not yards or miles, when referencing distance from your house.
  • Think a rodeo is a great place to see a horse.
  • Don't realize land beside a gravel road is private property
  • Get too involved in cell phone calls while driving to wave at other drivers.
  • Think farmers don't understand animal welfare or environmental issues.
  • Never cleaned something off your shoes to attend a social event.

About once every couple months, I have to get something off my chest.  That should do for a while.  I need to go check my cows anyway.  They are spread over 30 blocks right now.

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3 thoughts on “I’m From The Country…

  1. I got a chuckle out of this entire post, but I actually laughed out loud at the last sentence!

  2. Luckily, he changed to a cowboy! I wonder if he is a construction worker or a cop now?

  3. Hey wait a minute! I seem to remember that fella that said he use to be a moto cross driver!!! I believe that would be a moment my big brother had tell his little sister to...shhhhhhhhh! LOL

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