It was a peaceful evening at the ranch…  too peaceful.  Suddenly I became aware of a rucus in the cattle pasture.  Cows and calves were bawling and running from one fence to the other.  Knowing my cows, I deduced something was scaring them, or they had heard a cow circus was coming to town!  I checked the paper, nope, no cow circus this week.  Something was in the pasture!

Grabbing my .44, I jump in the truck and head through the gate and into the cattle melee.  The cows stay ahead of me and run over a hill out of sight.  As I top the hill, I see the cows have formed a circle around the offending creature.  Still bawling, pawing, and making themselves candidates for a mad cow laboratory, I make my cautious approach.  The cows are facing in looking at something when I see something strike from the grass, narrowly missing a nose.  What the heck!  I give a command only cows understand and the herd separates to let me get a closer inspection.

Wow!  That’s the biggest snapping turtle I have ever seen!  Using a scoop shovel, I flip the turtle over and scoop him in the back of my truck.  Back at the house, I yell to Honey Bunches, “Put the hamburger back in the freezer, we’re having turtle soup tommorrow”.  I look back at the fence where the cows have now gathered and are smiling cow smiles.  “You girls did that on purpose”,  I think to myself.